The God Meme

The internet is full of memes. One of my favorites are the God Meme. Basically it' s a picture of The Almighty with a little bit about how he operates.

Instead of listing them in all their bad graphic glory, I am just going to write  them out for you. (I'm sure this breaks some uber-nerd interwebs code of ethics)

Create AIDs - Forbid condoms.

Help actresses win awards - Do nothing about world hunger.

Wrath is a sin - Blow up cities to show who's boss.

Bow before me.  - I need the attention.

Create homosexuals - Ban homosexuality.

No worshiping idols  - Hang a cross in your home.

Omnipotent, perfect - Jealous.

Create world for humans - 70% salt water.

Japanese wave at me - I wave back.

Jews are my chosen people - LOL Holocaust.

Day 1: create light - Day 4: create light source.

Humanity descended from one man and one woman - Who only had sons.

Use Judas to fulfill grand plan, save humanity - LOL, burn in hell, Judas.

Help NFL team win Superbowl - Ignore starving Africans.

Make greed a sin - Make republicans my favorite party.

Unconditional love - with conditions.

Create entire universe out of nothing. - Need Adam's rib to create 1 more thing.

Job loves me and follows my rules - Kill his family and cover him in boils, lolz.

I hurricane cities because of their gay people - Usually in hurricane-prone areas during hurricane season.

Make sex really awesome - Forbid it.

Only true god - Incredibly jealous.

All Powerful - Cannot exterminate his demon problem.

Make heaven perfect - send man to earth.

Ban eating pigs - Create bacon.

I gave you free will - So use it exactly as I command you to.

Thou shalt not commit adultery - Sorry Joseph.

Lust is wrong - Yoga pants.

Make oil invaluable to society - Give it to the Arabs.

Gives you a sense of humor - Forbids you to laugh at blasphemous jokes.


So can you think of any others? Here is the God Meme Generator. If you make one or think of one, share it with us.


  1. So Neece, I "shared" your Facebook post on my profile and received the following from a theist "friend" from my old high school days (you have to pardon his spelling...).

    "This is rough Sean. If i was of some protected class of person, this would not be politically correct. If you said these kinds, or types of things about, women, jews, blacks, imigrants, muslims, short people, fat people, mentally retarded p...eople, etc. You would be chastised. And you would chastise me if i did. Yet, you say these things about Christians, simply because we do not believe, or agree with what you believe. Sean, really? Have we harmed you? For believing. Friend, we love you, even when you are mad at us, for believing. Steve"

    I had to respond with the following:

    Steve - Couple things:

    1. I didn't say these things, I simply reposted an interesting, and what I believe to be a thought provoking, article.

    2. Questioning long-standing assumptions/beliefs is how we grow as people. This wasn't meant t...o be offensive to any one individuals' faith; however, if you found it offensive, I would simply ask, what exactly was it that offended you? Obviously some of the memes are tongue in cheek, but others are dead on aren't they?

    3. Isn't this the same right/opportunity to espouse my belief (or lack thereof) as someone who puts a biblical quote in their status update? I don't go on to their update and say things like - "Yeah, whatever...there is no god..." That would be rude and mean...just curious how that works in the other direction.

    4. Atheists, or non-theists, are among the most discriminated groups in the US, even homosexuals have a better chance of being elected to public office in the US than an atheist - largely because they are cowed into being quiet and not voicing their views for public consumption and discourse. Just somethings to think about...

  2. Nice response, Sean. Thanks very much for sharing it.
    I cannot fathom how Christians identify themselves as persecuted in this country. They make that up out of whole cloth. I would say it's their defense mechanism against any kind of rational discourse and honest criticism. They certainly seem to want a drastically uneven playing field.