Any Regrets?
Side note: Do women have Midlife Crises? We always hear about men having them, but I've never heard of women going through them. Have I just not seen the signs?
Last year, about 2 weeks before my birthday, I saw my first grey hair. I was sort of proud of it - for all that I'd gone through to get that grey hair, but also felt a pang of dread as I realized my life was half over.
Now it's even more half over but I don't feel the same dread as I did last year. I have a couple more grey hairs now, and am hoping soon I'll have enough to start looking wise.
So as I think about my life, where I've come from, where I am now, and where I'd still like to go in my future, I came across an article written about a nurse who has recorded the regrets of the dying on a blog and now in a book: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing by Bronnie Ware.
From what I gather it's a memoir. The article listed the 5 regrets, so of course, I am going to share them briefly:
Some Lighthearted Fun, Kinda
Here is a better bible, and it's only one page. It can fit on a sticky note:
But first, I require that you go first, God. Follow your own rule and Don't Be a DICK!
And God would reply (predictably), "Do as I say, not as I do."
Which leads me to ask you, if the god of Abraham (we'll assume he's the same one for the Jews, Christians and Muslims) exists as he is represented in his "holy" books, would you worship him?
I wouldn't. No way. What a complete and utter childish bully he is. And fickle!
While the above image is for a bit of humor, I'd say that's a pretty good place to start when putting together your moral code. I rewrote mine awhile ago - Neece's Principles. It's a great exercise that helps you realize what's important to you and why, instead of just doing what we were taught by our religious leaders and parents, who probably got their morals from their churches.
What I Stand For and What I Believe
I don't believe in nothing. I believe in grand concepts like the pursuit of love and happiness. I believe in finding simple joys in everyday things.
I embrace knowledge and growth through learning as much as possible. I love science and the scientific method, which although flawed, is still the best tool we've got to understand our fantastic universe and our place in it. I am a citizen scientist.
I require evidence for claims and refuse to accept things on faith or authority. I am a skeptic.
But I am a true skeptic. Many times in the past I've changed my views based on evidence that showed that my old thinking was wrong. I constantly work on detaching my ego from my world view.
Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence, and since there is zero credible evidence for any gods or the supernatural, I don't believe in them. I don't believe in the supernatural in any sense. No gods, no heaven, no hell, no demons, no ghosts, no psychic powers. I am a skeptical atheist.
The New Ten Commandments
Christopher Hitchens just wrote a 3 page piece for Vanity Fair about the 10 commandments titled The New Commandments. He goes through the KJV version and talks about where they are good and where they are not so good. Here is his summation:
What emerges from the first review is this: the Ten Commandments were derived from situational ethics. They show every symptom of having been man-made and improvised under pressure. They are addressed to a nomadic tribe whose main economy is primitive agriculture and whose wealth is sometimes counted in people as well as animals. They are also addressed to a group that has been promised the land and flocks of other people: the Amalekites and Midianites and others whom God orders them to kill, rape, enslave, or exterminate. And this, too, is important because at every step of their arduous journey the Israelites are reminded to keep to the laws, not because they are right but just because they will lead them to become conquerors (of, as it happens, almost the only part of the Middle East that has no oil).
So here is a rundown of how he fixes them:
- One to Three can go, "since they have nothing to do with morality and are no more than a long, rasping throat clearing by an admittedly touchy dictator. Mere fear of unseen authority is not a sound basis for ethics." (the invisible sky daddy flexes his muscles and demands worship.).
- He also says we don't have to ban sculpture and art (idols).
- Four. Gone. Pointless. (don't work on the sabbath, except black sabbath, of course!)
- Five, respect elders, sure. But also ban child abuse. What a concept! (I'd add that parents should only get respect like anyone else, when they earn it.)
- Six, taken care of by modern law. Don't murder. (Don't kill under almost all circumstances.) (although I think assisted suicide for terminally ill people should be legal)
- Seven, he seems to destroy too. (adultery) (and yeah, what about saying rape is bad? especially pedophilia and that kind of stuff?)
- Eight, ok. This one is good. Don't steal. (stealing)
- Nine, don't lie. Also basically good. (lying about your neighbor)
- Ten, women aren't property. This one is pointless and harmful in that it makes you a sinner just from your thoughts. (don't lust after your neighbor's goods or wife)
Other evils of human society that should be denounced, according to Hitchens:
- genocide
- slavery
- rape
- child abuse
- sexual repression
- white-collar crime
- wanton destruction of the natural world
- people who talk on cell phones in restaurants (and movie theatres, or who talk on the phone or text while driving!)
- people who blow themselves up while shouting 'god is great!' (and any other kind of jihadism or crusade)
- racism
- using people as private property
- condemning people for their inborn nature (like homosexuality, etc)
And this is how he finishes:
"Be willing to renounce any god or any religion if any holy commandments should contradict any of the above. In short: Do not swallow your moral code in tablet form."
Good advice! I think I stand by the principles I came up with for myself. What are yours? Do you agree with Christopher Hitchens?
