Any Regrets?

My birthday is fast approaching. As I get closer to the end of another year's journey around the sun, I am thinking more about my age and my life. I'm going to be 43 (only 43!) so if I live to a nice happy age of 86, this is Middle Age.

Side note: Do women have Midlife Crises? We always hear about men having them, but I've never heard of women going through them. Have I just not seen the signs?

Last year, about 2 weeks before my birthday, I saw my first grey hair. I was sort of proud of it - for all that I'd gone through to get that grey hair, but also felt a pang of dread as I realized my life was half over.

Now it's even more half over but I don't feel the same dread as I did last year. I have a couple more grey hairs now, and am hoping soon I'll have enough to start looking wise.

So as I think about my life, where I've come from, where I am now, and where I'd still like to go in my future, I came across an article written about a nurse who has recorded the regrets of the dying on a blog and now in a book: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying: A Life Transformed by the Dearly Departing by Bronnie Ware.

From what I gather it's a memoir. The article listed the 5 regrets, so of course, I am going to share them briefly:

Soul Searching For Godless Heathens

I was recently asked about my worldview. Specifically I was asked what I find lacking in it. What do I see as flawed with it?

I've thought about this. I think by its very nature, my worldview is ideal for me. I don't see any flaws at all. But first, let's define it.

Worldview: 1. The overall perspective from which one sees and interprets the world. 2. A collection of beliefs about life and the universe held by an individual or a group.

So,  it's a very comprehensive set of beliefs about the world. And I'm very happy with the worldview I've thoughtfully developed. I will say it was a process, though, which is ongoing and, like all critical thinking, open to new information that can alter it.

Mine is based on Naturalism - a scientific account of the world in terms of causes and natural forces that rejects all spiritual, supernatural, or teleological explanations; Humanism - a progressive philosophy of life that, without theism and other supernatural beliefs, affirms our ability and responsibility to lead ethical lives of personal fulfillment that aspire to the greater good of humanity; and Nature - nature is awesome and humans are responsible for taking care of the world to the best of our ability, and to be humane to other living creatures.

In those respects, science is very important to me because it's how we understand and progress. Through science the Universe gets to know itself (rough paraphrase from my hero, Carl Sagan), and we get to know our world and everything in it, including ourselves.

Science isn't everything though. There's also humanity and what we have developed*, such as consciousness and cognition, justice, beauty, love, humaneness, compassion, morality, genius, and on and on. (*note that there are animals that have some consciousness and self awareness, which is amazing and awesome. It shows that we are on the far end of the continuum, but still connected and an integral part of the animal kingdom!)

My worldview has been cultivated and formed over my life, but especially in the last 10 years since I've become an atheist. In other words, I've really thought about this, it isn't something told to me by anyone. And I think that's important for finding that it's complete and comfortable for me.

I thought I'd turn the question over to you. What is your worldview and do you feel yours has any flaws in it that bother you, that you find missing or less than fulfilling?

Letting the Holiday Pendulum Come to the Middle

I like things in balance. I like moderation. I don't always eat in moderation, but I understand I'd probably be happier if I did. I know we can't always be balanced, of course, but sometimes the middle ground is a nice, mellow place to be.

As you know, I don't talk about politics, but if you asked me what I am, I'd probably label myself some sort of moderate. I think both extremes are unhealthy. When you start talking about diets where something is given up, I think moderation is a much more realistic goal.

Certainly there are areas where denial of something is for the best, where something like alcohol or cigarettes are completely harmful (alcohol is not completely harmful to most people, but to someone who can't control their intake, then it is definitely a serious problem).

Anyway, what am I rambling on about? Well, I was raised in a traditional dysfunctional christian household with Santa, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. Even after I shed the heavy dead albatross of religion and became a godless heathen, I still put up a tree, gave christmas cards and gifts, and had christmas dinners with family.

Then a couple of years ago I completely swung the other way. I ditched the tree and decorations, told people I'd rather just spend time with them during the holidays than exchange gifts or cards (thereby abandoning the stress, guilt and huge expense), and basically just went to family dinners (well, can you blame me? Good food should never be forsaken!)

But a friend's status update on Facebook a few minutes ago reminded me that maybe my little black cindered grinch heart is still beating after all. My friend merely said that he was getting ready to celebrate Festivus and I thought, "Oh, that sounds like fun. A secular celebration!" So I don't have to seem like such a scrooge. I can just say I celebrate something different.

12 Questions About Morals By Sam Harris

Sam Harris wrote an article answering 12 questions relating to his book, The Moral Landscape: How Science Can Determine Human Values, which is due to be released October 5th:

1. Are there right and wrong answers to moral questions?

Morality must relate, at some level, to the well-being of conscious creatures. If there are more and less effective ways for us to seek happiness and to avoid misery in this world -- and there clearly are -- then there are right and wrong answers to questions of morality.

2. Are you saying that science can answer such questions?

Yes, in principle. Human well-being is not a random phenomenon. It depends on many factors -- ranging from genetics and neurobiology to sociology and economics. But, clearly, there are scientific truths to be known about how we can flourish in this world. Wherever we can have an impact on the well-being of others, questions of morality apply.

3. But can't moral claims be in conflict? Aren't there many situations in which one person's happiness means another's suffering?

Ideas About Atheist Groups

As you may know, I'm the co-cat herder (co-director) of Morgantown Atheists, a local group for unbelievers. I'm also the coordinator for Morgantown Coalition of Reason, an umbrella organization that encompasses Morgantown Atheists and other local groups so that we can work together in the name of Reason.

The funny thing is, I'm not really a people person. Like a lot of atheists (supposedly), I'm quite an outsider, as much of a hermit as I can get away with, in fact. I have never liked going out in crowds or socializing with large groups of people.

Why am I telling you all of this? Because I have realized something that I want to share with you. Even though I'm a curmudgeonly hermit-y atheist, I love going to the 3 atheist/freethinker meetings we have every month. That's 3 Sundays a month where I happily leave the house and go socialize with a small group of people. And I look forward to it. The one or 2 Sundays where we don't meet I miss it.

Even people like me benefit from social community and contact. The beauty of the atheist/freethinker community is that we are relatively like-minded. We have a foundation of common ground. But we are also quite different, of course, which is good because that makes things interesting. The added bonus of freethinkers, skeptics and atheists is that we seem relatively level-headed (overall - there are exceptions,  of course) and we argue and discuss matters with interest and fairness. No drama llama is invited! So it's actually fun and mentally stimulating.

I think we all need some type of community, which is one thing that religion has in its favor that being a lone atheist does not.

But this is easily remedied. I thought I'd share some thoughts on how to get involved with a secular group of like-minded people. If none exist in your area, you can start one up.

Tips For Finding A Local Atheist/Humanist/Freethinker/Skeptical Community

Happy Spring Equinox!

So yesterday was the Spring (Vernal) Equinox in the northern hemisphere. It was at 12:32 pm to be exact. Many different cultures have celebrated in different ways. But my friends and I at Morgantown Atheists thought we'd celebrate in our own way. We got together, ate delicious food, talked about anything and everything, had a book meeting, had a Nature Walk on our friends' farm and generally enjoyed ourselves, nature, and spring returning.

I thought I'd share some pictures from our Nature Walk.

In our conversations we talked about how people struggle when they are questioning their faith. It's different for everyone, but some of the big things you have to give up are:

• Your consciousness living forever in heaven. Life after death.


• Someone thinking for you, telling you what your morals are, and spoon-feeding you the big answers to questions about why we're here, etc.


• Community from your church. Sometimes this is everyone you know. Family and friends.

A Happy Day For Lolcats

Hey everyone,

I really wanted to say hi today but it's my birthday and I am busy baking myself a cake and getting ready to go to dinner. So you will have to make do with some of my favorite recent lolcats and one 2012 comic. Enjoy!

"I only had room to go up to 2012."  .. "Ha! That'll freak somebody out someday."

Ceiling Kitteh decides ur fate

2 New Symphony of Science Songs, One Helpful Diagram

First a funny and accurate poster about The Believer, then awesome science music. Thanks to Pharyngula who found this:



Awhile ago I shared the Symphony of Science, which is music made out of scientists talking using AutoTune (I believe that's what it's called). Carl Sagan, Neil deGrasse Tyson, Richard Dawkins and many others lend their voices for these songs that are quite inspiring. One thing, they are very different. The first time I heard one, I thought it was really strange and didn't care for it. But after a few minutes, I really fell in love with them.

There are two new songs. Here are their videos. Go to Symphony of Science to download the songs or videos, or to donate to the project.

The Unbroken Thread (4 minutes)

A Symphony of Science

I have some videos to share with you today. All three are created by John Boswell and are different, interesting, inspiring and thought provoking. You can find the videos with the lyrics and downloads of the songs in different formats at his site: The Symphony of Science. Here's what the site says:

"The Symphony of Science is a musical project by John Boswell designed to deliver scientific knowledge and philosophy in musical form. Here you can watch music videos, download songs, read lyrics and find links relating to the messages conveyed by the music."

The first time I heard A Glorious Dawn was on the Reasonable Doubts podcast. I didn't care for it for the first few seconds but it grew on me very quickly. When I watched the videos I was inspired. Basically Carl Sagan and other awesome scientists are singing in a synthesized way. There's a special program that does this, but I can't think of what it's called at the moment. Ozzie and Cher have both put out albums using this same technique to save their sagging voices. But here John Boswell turns speech into music.

All three are awesome. I hope you try them out. Go to the website to download the music. A Glorious Dawn is also available on iTunes!

Holiday Cards For Atheists and Nontheists

Hey Everyone! Sorry for the delay in posting but things got a bit crazy here. My friend Will and I were interviewed for WV Public Radio the other day and that kept me busy getting ready. I will be sure to link you to the broadcast when it goes live next week. It was regarding our billboard and new organization, the Morgantown Coalition of Reason, that I've mentioned. It's been keeping me quite busy.

Anyway, the other thing that has kept me busy is thinking of the holidays that are fast approaching. While I like getting together with friends and family and celebrating, I don't like the religious nature of it all (of course). One thing that really frustrates me is the card selection.

So I decided to try my hand at designing some irreverent cards! I dug through my favorite winter pictures that I've taken over the years, then came up with some messages for nontheists (with the help of my most awesome husband Butch, of course), and uploaded them to Zazzle.

I would like to do a few more, but these are a good start, I think. If you have ideas you'd like to see created, feel free to comment or Email Me.

~ Begin Shameless Promotion Here~

Just Be Good For Goodness Sake! Three cards with original photography by © ZeNeece and 3 slightly different messages.

The Cardinals Agree Card		Retain Your Reason This Season! Card		Snow Angel Jesus Card

See inside messages and matching stamps as well as postcards:

Add Us To The Map!

Here in West Virginia, it seems like everyone must be traditionally religious. People wear crosses around their necks and churches seem to be on every corner. But there are godless people scattered about. When I first moved here I felt like I had to hide my lack of faith in the closet. It was oppressive, and still can be at gatherings or over the holidays.

Then I met Tim. He's a friend of mine who is also an atheist and he encouraged Butch and I to come to a Morgantown Atheist meeting. Earlier this year we did and it was awesome! Here were people who were like us, who had similar views of the world in matters of religion as us. The next month we joined the Freethinkers Morgantown Book Club too.

One thing we wanted to do at Morgantown Atheists was to get a billboard like other cities across the country and around the world. We started getting a bit more organized, then found the United Coalition of Reason. They believe that local organizations who don't even know about each other should work together, pool our resources, and reach out together to people who don't even know the little groups exist.

Before you know it, we formed the Morgantown Coalition of Reason! That's the Morgantown Atheists, the Morgantown Brights, the Freethinkers Morgantown Book Club* and the Morgantown Thomas Paine Society*. Now together we can do projects together and all kinds of good stuff. Since we got together, I've met a lot of other people from the other groups and they're great!

So the UnitedCoR helped us get our billboard! For a month we're going to be calling out to the godless of our area, letting them know where to find us, and that they are not alone. People of Reason, unite!

If you're in West Virginia, you can contact the MorgantownCoR to see about joining. In fact, you can contact me, because I'm the Coordinator.

If you're in another part of the country, think about contacting UnitedCoR to help you get organized too. United we stand. And together we can make a positive difference in our communities and around the country. :)

Happy Atheists! Survey Finds We're As Happy As Nuns

I have all this information to share with you, but I haven't had a chance to organize it properly. So I've decided to kind of throw it out to you with a few notes and let you process it at your leisure, instead of wait any longer. Last month the results of a survey were released. The survey was all about the godless and it was done by Professor Luke Galen.

Luke Galen does a podcast called Reasonable Doubts with two other awesome guys, Jeremy Beahan and David Fletcher. I love this podcast and have been listening to all the past episodes to try to catch up. Just recently I listened to episode 32, Profiles of the Godless where Dr. Galen addressed CFI Michigan with his results. This was recorded back in January of this year, before his paper was published. I highly recommend listening to the podcast as it makes the data come together to make sense.

Along with the podcast, you can look at Luke Galen's pdf presentation that he used for the talk. Note: He has zero sense of color or graphic design. The charts are pretty painful to look at. But if you follow along with them while you listen to the podcast it really helps. Use eyedrops to keep your eyes from bleeding. lol

Another take on the data is presented by the Center for Inquiry. They did a press release last month and summed it up briefly. And here is a 5 page pdf of the results that won't make your eyes bleed. It's mostly text as opposed to charts.

This study was really awesome. First, it looked at nonbelievers in all their different aspects and iterations. How many of us still claim to be spiritual, etc? And the chart I found most awesome was how atheists find themselves to be relatively happy (life satisfaction, page 16 of the pdf). The interesting bit there is that people who are comfortable and rather set in their belief or nonbelief are much happier than people who doubt, like agnostics. In other words, being certain in your belief or nonbelief of god(s) helps with emotional stability.

I did come to the conclusion that I'm a bit of a statistical anomoly, though. Most atheists tend to be white men who have higher education and make good money. The only thing I have in common with them is that they have fewer children (Oh, I'm white, too. LOL) So yeah, I'm a white woman with only a bit of college, mostly self-educated, I'm not spiritual in the least (whereas most female atheists also claim to be spiritual), I'm a housewife, and I have no kids. So I guess I'm not your typical atheist.

Dr. Galen also looks into the issue of labels, which I find interesting. We have friends that call themselves Brights and avoid the A word. And I would never call myself a Bright and am proud to be called Atheist. Some people like to be called Humanist or spiritual. So he looks into that. When forced to pick just one label, a lot of people chose atheist which was interesting.

I'd love to see this go further, to ask even more questions of atheists. Maybe then it wouldn't be so hard for us to come together, to unite for common causes.

What do you think? Your thoughts are welcome, as usual. :)

A Happy, Frustrated Atheist

Hey everyone! First, let's catch up.

• Comments: Thanks for the great comments recently! I promise to reply to each of them but I am falling behind. I realized some of them really require a post devoted to them instead of just a reply. So please don't think I'm ignoring you. I will comment soon.


• Computers: It's true. Ask my poor long-suffering husband Butch, I am missing the Patience gene. My computer has been doing strange things since I reinstalled windows (which I do every 6 months to a year to keep things fresh and in working order, as every past geek friend of mine has recommended) and I found out through Lifehacker that Windows 7 beta is freely available for download. Well, of course I had to do it. I have waited as long as possible, but the ADD, Shiny-Loving Geek in me had to have it. I'm such a sucker for the shiny when it comes to geek stuff. (Luckily for Butch, I couldn't care less about diamonds and that kind of nonsense. Unfortunately though, I need gadgets and computers and stuff like that.) It's my kryptonite, I guess. So I just had to have windows 7, and now, of course, I'm having problems with the virtual memory. Sigh. So bear with me, it's taking me quite some time to try to figure out the issue and see if I can find a fix. On a completely unrelated note, I'm interviewing geeks to be my new BFF. Please apply within. :P

Ok, now, I want to talk to you briefly about happiness. Are you an atheist? Are you happy? This lingering idea keeps wandering around that all atheists are curmudgeonly, grumpy, miserable, fatalistic and depressed.

I've been an atheist for 9 years, and for many years before that I was basically an agnostic. I have to say, I think discarding religion was a huge relief. I think I felt better. Once I finally learned to think critically, I think I started really seeing rationally and really appreciating the natural wonders of the universe. If anything, this process has left me more happy, more fascinated by the world of science and discovery. I think I'm happier and calmer, yet always eager to learn and grow.

But I think I probably come across under certain circumstances as a furious cynic. Why would that be? Which is the real me? The happy atheist is who I think I'd identify with best. But my bullshit meter has become increasingly sensitive. So when someone says something that screams of ignorance and a total lack of thinking for oneself, I just tend to get irritated, frustrated and grumpy.

It seems that wherever I go I'm surrounded by sheeple people who let others think for them. They spew forth the rubbish and lies that had been told to them by people in some strange version of authority (whether that be their minister, the pope, the government, or a slick marketing campaign) and that's good enough for them. They wallow in their ignorance like it was some sort of universal remedy. Thinking is endangered and that pisses me off, and worries me.

Anyway, other than that, I'm quite a content person overall. Are you an atheist? Or a believer? Are you happy and content? Or are you angry and bitter and curmudgeonly? If you're happy, do you still get really angry over certain things? I look forward to your comments! Oh,and have a great evening! :D

Tweenbots Show How Wonderful Humans Can Be

Unlike most atheists I know, I don't really consider myself a humanist, but maybe that's because I really don't know the full definition. Let's look it up.

Humanism affirms the dignity and worth of all people, based on the ability to determine right and wrong by appealing to universal human qualities, particularly rationality, without resorting to the supernatural or alleged divine authority from religious texts. Humanism can be considered as a process by which truth and morality is sought through human investigation; as such, views on morals can change when new knowledge and information is discovered. In focusing on the capacity for self-determination, humanism rejects transcendental justifications, such as a dependence on faith, the supernatural, or texts of allegedly divine origin. Humanists endorse universal morality based on the commonality of the human condition, suggesting that solutions to human social and cultural problems cannot be parochial.

While I agree in principle with that definition, I have become rather cynical and jaded. My experience of people is less noble and dignified. Most people seem self-serving, narcissistic and self-centered. I've found that many people refrain from immoral acts only out of fear of punishment or guilt. Also, I've found that people in general don't seek truth or look outside themselves much at all. They simply go about their lives to get by as comfortably as possible, mitigated by guilt and fear.

Of course there are lots of exceptions of extraordinary people. But in general my view of the human race is more like children in adult bodies, basically just going through life like a ball in a pinball machine, bouncing off of things and careening around randomly. I think it takes supreme effort to break free of this thoughtless kind of life, where you run on belief systems formed in early childhood. It takes critical and creative thinking to break free of the mold we are indoctrinated into as children.

But, sometimes I am surprised and delighted by humanity. It doesn't happen often, so when it does, I feel the desire to share my warm fuzzies with everyone. This is one of those moments. I was stumbling around the interwebs when I came upon Tweenbots. In this 3 and a half minute video, Tweenbot is traversing Washington Square Park. He does it in 42 minutes with 29 people helping him.

Wild Geese by Mary Oliver - My Favorite Poem

You do not have to be good.
You do not have to walk on your knees
for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.
Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine.
Meanwhile the world goes on.
Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain
are moving across the landscapes,
over the prairies and the deep trees,
the mountains and the rivers.
Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air,
are heading home again.
Whoever you are, no matter how lonely,
the world offers itself to your imagination,
calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting—
over and over announcing your place
in the family of things.

from Dream Work by Mary Oliver
published by Atlantic Monthly Press
© Mary Oliver

Why am I sharing this?

Remaking America - Day One

We have a new president! Our 44th president of the United States of America!
The full video of the oath and address available here.

This is an exciting time! And dare I say it? The future looks promising. We have some hard work to do, to hopefully fix the mistakes of previous administrations, but if President Obama really meant what he said in his speech, I think things are looking up. I'll say this for our new president, he gives a great speech. It's thrilling to see an eloquent and educated person leading us to our bright future once again.

I want to go through and highlight some of the points he made. My emphasis is in bold, the transcript is in its entirety, thank you Huffington Post.

20 Reasons I Am godless

Here are 20 reasons I have to be godless. Consider it a work in progress because I'm sure there are plenty of other great reasons I am not thinking of right now. I certainly welcome your suggestions for future lists and refinements.

1. I understand that Zeus, Santa, the Easter Bunny, Odin, Osiris and all of their ilk are fairy tale characters, stories made up to explain things that weren't known at the time, or to get weak-minded people to do what someone wanted. They are all just stories to tell to children or sheep, to keep them in line or entertain them. Jesus, Yahweh, Allah and Jehovah are no different. I've studied world religions. They're all mythical and steal from each other. They are all about submission and control of simple people through fear and coercion.

Happy New Year, Heathens!

Here's to an interesting year coming to a close, and the beginning of a fresh new year full of change and promise.



I hope you're all having fun with your celebrations and being safe getting to and from any parties.



This change is really just an arbitrary moment in time. A time to take stock, and a time to celebrate.

Next year will be awesome. I know, that's my optimism speaking, but we'll make it the best year it can be. :)

Thank you for helping me be my best this year. Luvz U guyz!

Aww, damnit, I was aiming for posting at exactly midnight. But my awesome husband just called to wish me a Happy New Year. Damn, I love that guy. Ok, thank you again for being such great readers and commenters. Suggestions always welcome, as are guest posters. :)

Since I'm already late, how about one more lolcat? Let's see if I can find a really good one. (actually the optimist pessimist is one of my favs at the moment :P )

HAPPY NEW YEAR! It's 2009!

Happy Winter Solstice! Let's Celebrate With Lolcats!

It's that time of year, my friends. The Winter Solstice, the longest night of the year for us in the Northern Hemisphere, has arrived.

Wow. It's Over! And Other Goodness

First, let's do the other goodness. The political bit follows. My friend has been busy lately and I want to share what he's been doing.

• Global Atheist is an aggregate site that refreshes every 15 minutes. It's a great place to scan lots of awesome skeptical and atheist sites at once.

Now for the Rambling Political Bit:

After about 2 years of campaigning and general political nastiness, it's over. We'll have a new president soon! Change is in the air! President Barack Obama. I don't know about you, but I'm so glad it's done.

It seems that most of America is probably relieved and happy today, while some people (like my parents) are very angry and busy selling off their stocks so that they can leave the country. Maybe they can move to Canada. Oh wait, Canada really IS a socialist country. Just teasing.

Hopefully things will settle down, and people will get on with their lives. My phone didn't ring all day from the Republican party, telling me how to think, so it was nice to have some peace and quiet.

I feel like there is so much potential for positive change. I hope good things will be able to happen with a new administration.

What does it mean to us, the little people, to have a new president? Hopefully a lot. In my humble opinion, things can only get better after the past 8 years. Apparently most of America agrees that it was time for something different. WOOT!